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Evaluate Partnership: Couple Coaching

Systemic Couple Coach Training

We present interactive, demonstration-rich workshops on systemic coaching, happy partnership, resolving family chaos and relationship bonds. Email us if you would like a seminar or workshop in your area.

Should you stay together?

Is your marriage or partnership in trouble? Or is it good and you want to make it even better? Couple coaching can help you decide whether or not to start an intimate partnership, whether or not to get married, whether or not to continue your relationship - or whether or not to separate?

(Individual coaching can help you prepare for partnership, while conjoint family coaching can help you solve problems with in-laws, children and the daily challenges that families must face.)

Do you stay in a partnership with despair and depression? Do you pray for some miracle? Do you have or consider sexual affairs? Do you hope to be rescued? Or do you want to resolve your difficulties and build a partnership based on integrity and lasting happiness?

Couple Coaching Flowchart and Testimonial

Good intentions are not enough for you and your partner to love, to teamwork and to create intimacy that survives life challenges. Soulwork life coaching can help you both evaluate and change your relationships - and your relationship habits - and help you both build both commitment and skills. We can help you experience and understand each other's history, perspectives, beliefs and values, as a basis for a caring relationship which supports both of you.

Enjoying Partnership  Systemic Couple Coaching

Put ELATION in your Relationship

But we still love each other! Your relationship depends on your expressions of love - not only on your feelings, but on the ways that you both express caring. Withheld or unexpressed love may not survive the tests of your everyday reality. Can one of you not commit to your partnership because of previous entangled relationships, confused habits or dissociated emotions? Your feeling of love is rarely enough - instead you can learn partnership skills with couple coaching.

Who were your teachers of love? Who taught you partnership skills? Who now inspires you to solve relationship problems? Who are your role models for happy partnership? Or did you learn how to love from toxic relatives, TV, cinema and "love" songs? Who can you talk to? Who has successfully dealt with those issues before? Soulwork relationship coaching may be perfect.

Most problems have loving solutions. If a partnership appears to have insoluble problems, then divorce may seem unavoidable. If you are afraid for yourself or for your children ... perhaps fear of abuse, addictions or threats of violence ... then separation may be needed, unless you and your partner are actively involved in a proven, effective recovery program.

Can relationship coaching solve your problems?

How long do you wait before you search for help? Do you wait until your suffering reaches PANIC? By that time, it may be too late. You may alienate your partner or be dependent on some drug. The earlier you get appropriate coaching - the more likely coaching will help you.

Do you both want to solve your problems? Or do you create problems to motivate separation? If you or your partner is deliberately sabotaging your partnership, your situation may seem unsolvable and separation inevitable - unless you both regain your intimacy and commitment.

Counterfeit Love Sexual Issues Sexual Solutions

If neither of you lives in fear or anger; then systemic couple coaching can help you resolve most issues; including financial problems, boredom and frustration. If both of you can commit to evaluating your partnership, and if both of you are responsible adults - budgets can be made, boredom can be reversed and arguments can become stimulating conversations. But if either of you rejects possibilities for reconciliation, then indifference, affairs, separation or divorce may seem inevitable.

Affairs Dependencies Space for Love

Your partner is not perfect!

Some people separate, not motivated by suffering, but by fantasies. You may imagine that somewhere - a more perfect person awaits you. Or, your partner wants to make a change (e.g. new job, new house or traveling) that you feel would exclude you; or one of you has a sexual affair; or one of you changes your priorities or values. Many partnership crises are predictable.

Predictable Partnership Premarital Coaching

In every partnership, both partners have expectations, conditions or requirements. As these are communicated, you and your partner may experience a series of speed bumps (sleeping policemen), unless and until you both communicate your requirements realistically, consistent with both of your values ... and make mutual agreements. Couple coaching can help you do this.

A partner may confuse a relationship requirement with an ultimatum, manipulation or emotional blackmail. None of these require separation or divorce - they require careful evaluation to find out what happened, and how to effectively deal with similar issues in the future.

Systemic Couple Coaching

•  want to improve, evaluate or change your relationships
•  are considering living or working together
•  are considering to stop living or working together
• are unsure, and want to make some basic decisions about your future

Conjoint Couple Coaching is a luxury for people with happy partnerships. It provides many opportunities to prevent problems happening, to stop small problems from becoming worse and to solve big problems. Couple coaching can increase the pleasure and sense of partnership.

Many partners do not dissolve problems quickly. Only after they have suffered enough do they either get their act together or they end potentially-wonderful relationships in passive-aggression, depression or worse.

Depression Suicide

You have other choices. Long-term happiness is possible. Systemic couple coaching can help you improve and stabilize your partnership crisis for increased happiness. Get systemic coaching to prepare for partnership or marriage, to resolve problematic or dependent relationships, to enjoy projects and parenthood together and to survive crisis.

And, if one or both of you want to end your partnership, systemic coaching can help you separate peacefully or divorce with dignity.

Systemic Couple Coaching Divorce Coaching Children of Divorce

Evaluating Partnership

Partnership coaching can help you clarify basic decisions and commitments about working or living together. Many people who want partnership delay or avoid these decisions. Partnership evaluation can provide the resources for both partners to discuss and make basic decisions.

If both of you want your partnership to be an intimate environment where you can work as an intimate team, perhaps to raise children and to develop yourselves, then both of you will want a happy partnership.

If one or both of you are trying to use a partnership as a way to free yourselves from other relationships, or to gain assets or privileges from your partner, then you may prefer a pleasant friendship to a stressful partnership.

Partnership Coaching - Communication

Communication between partners can help both partners discover and define the components of a fulfilling relationship. This communication may be difficult without a coach, as both partners will be aware that this communication may lead to one or both partners feeling stressed.

Partnership Evaluation helps both partners rediscover each other. Relationship stress may be due to an inability to cope with everyday life, or it may be connected with other relationships. A couple coach can help the partners deal with problems and build a new freedom from parents, ex-partners and other relationships. Couple coaching can lay a foundation for a new way of life!

Evaluating Partnership is for people who can cope with stress. If one partner has poor health, lacks financial security or a supporting social network, evaluation can continue when the partners have appropriate support (e.g. supportive family, welfare counseling, support groups, medical treatment, etc). Happiness may not be easy - but it is possible.

A systemic coach can assist both partners to remain resourceful at the end of evaluating partnership, regardless of the decisions made ... only if Partnership Evaluation is completed.

Partnership Coaching - Evaluation

A good couple coach can ensure that both partners stay resourceful. A coaching relationship begins from the first contact, and can be deepened by gaining permission from both partners to:

•  interrupt a potential crisis at any time
•  gently reopen any difficult issue or topic
•  provide brief individual coaching as required
•  support the least resourceful partner
•  elicit and dissolve transferences* and transference loops*

Partnership Requirements

Partnership evaluation clarifies relationship requirements and avoids manipulation. Through a systemic coaching relationship, an effective relationship coach can:

•  Help you express your requirements, clearly and specifically
•  Help you answer a requirement with a congruent “Yes” or “No”
•  If a final answer is "Yes", prepare both of you to fulfill that requirement
•  If a final answer is "No", provide both of you with individual coaching

Enjoying Partnership

Specialists provide the best services - and we specialize in relationship coaching. We coach people to resolve relationship issues - for example concerning current crises, families of origin, past partners or missing relationship skills.

Do you want better relationships? Get cost effective and confidential services in business, team and partnership coaching, and to solve marriage, family and team communication problems.

Use your initiative: email

Systemic Coach Training

Do you want relationship coaching or systemic coach training? We can train you to coach individuals, partners and teams to resolve a wide range of physical, emotional, educational and relationship challenges.

Systemic Coach Training welcomes friendly, emotionally stable people. Enhance your career with life coach and relationship coaching skills. Coach people to gain clarity, dissolve success and relationship issues, and understand what makes sense in life. Help people build success and quality relationships. You can help people fulfill their dreams.

Resources that can help you

The Anatomy of An Affair

Dealing with affairs?

Why do people risk their happiness and their families to have affairs?

Act with confidence, know EXACTLY how to break free from an affair

Catch your cheating spouse yourself

Why do you go through so much suspicion and denial?

Infidelity
Emergency Kit

Instant access to the widest available range of topics on surviving infidelity

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Plagiarism is theft. Copyright © Martyn Carruthers 1996-2011 All rights reserved. Soulwork Systemic Coaching was primarily developed by Martyn Carruthers
to help people dissolve emotional blocks, improve relationships and achieve goals. These concepts and strategies are for general knowledge only. Consult a physician about medical conditions and before changing medical treatment. Don't steal intellectual property ... ask for permission to post, publish or teach this work.