Soulwork Home Page

Check your spelling

Soulwork Online Help

Soulwork Humor: Funny stories


Soulwork Systemic Coaching: Summary

Soulwork Coach Training

Soulwork FAQ Questions & Answers


Emotional Issues
Anger & Rage

Eating Problems
Emotional Maturity
Grief & Loss
Inner Child

Pain Control
Stress Relief

Toxic Beliefs
Trauma & Stress
Weight Loss


Relationship Problems

Dissolve Conflicts
Emotional Blackmail

Enjoy Partnership
Evaluate Partners
Long-Distance Love
Love & Hate

Past Partners
Sexual Issues
Soul Mates


Family Challenges

Brothers & Sisters
Divorce & Children
Emotional Incest
Family Meetings
Family Secrets

Fathers & Daughters
Fathers & Sons
Learning Disorders
Mothers & Daughters
Mothers & Sons

Parental Alienation


Life Lessons
Bad Habits
Being Alone
Children's Challenges
Observing Feelings

Patterns in Love
Personal Growth
Quantum Leap
Self Esteem
Self Improvement
Self Intimacy
Stress & Relaxing
Therapist and Clients


Chaos Coaching

Inner Conflict
Expert Modeling
Learning Disorders

Sexual Abuse
Soul of Soulwork
Systemic Management
Therapist Abuse
Training Abuse



Interview with Martyn
Fee, Cost, Price

eXTReMe Tracker

Communication Coaching
& Training

Online Coaching & Mentorship

Are you entangled in difficult relationships or painful emotions? Do you suffer from old trauma? Do you suffer your parents' drama, your partner's demands, your boss's moods? We can help you untangle your life ... and you can coach other people to reclaim their freedom.


You communicate while you are alive, and a huge part of your communication is non-verbal. Our systemic coach training offers you deep insights into verbal and non-verbal communication. Although people may suspect that you read their thoughts, you can learn to read their bodies.

We developed our systemic training programs during 12 years of training therapists and counselors to coach difficult clients. We train medical staff to recognize and respond to the signals of unconscious patients. We trained blind people to notice and respond to auditory signals - and we can train your people to use these skills.

  •  Recognize and resolve verbal and non-verbal objections
  •  Communication flexibility - notice and adapt to communication styles
  •  Dissolve blocks to friendship, teamwork, partnership and leadership
  •  Interview skills for selecting partners and team members, performance reviews, etc
  •  Negotiation skills for family, team and business meetings

Healthy Relationships

Key Benefits

  • Develop effective family and working relationships
  • Resolve communication and relationship problems
  • Recognize and clarify entangled relationships
  • Notice when a person is ready to accept your offer

Training Notes

  1. Our training courses include lectures, demonstrations, exercises and case discussions
  2. We have a strong emphasis on group learning, within and outside the class
  3. We set skill development projects as homework

Interpersonal Skills

After you have evaluated and clarified relationships with family members (living, missing and dead), then you are more likely to be interested in improving your interpersonal skills to have better relationships with family, friends and colleagues. Good communication skills can reduce feelings of isolation, help build quality relationships and improve team performance.

In the relationship hierarchy that we use, we find that friendship skills are a basis for the more complex teamwork, and team skills are a basis for the more complex skills required for partnership and parenthood. If marriage and other forms of partnership can be seen as long-term commitments to happiness, then communication training can help you increase and further happiness.

Know Yourself

Express Yourself Respond to Others
Relax Start conversations

Recognize & respond to emotions appropriately

Concentrate Ask questions Respond to failure
Label emotions Listen Respond to complaints
Mange emotions & impulses Show affection, caring & concern Handle criticism & objections
Evaluate abilities Express anger, sadness & fear Respond to persuasion
Set priorities Show appreciation Prepare for stress
Set goals Express doubt Negotiate
Make decisions Help others Give instructions
Make plans Ask for help Deal with group pressure
Take action Assert yourself Stay resourceful in crisis

You will face many challenges when you coach people to deal with the diversity of issues that your clients and employees face. We find that the most frequent challenge of our graduate coaches are coping effectively with many different types of people. One size does not fit all! Coping with the following and other personality differences is part of our systemic coach training.

These differences include:

  1. Different thinking styles
  2. Different learning styles
  3. Different personality styles
  4. Different communication skills
  5. Different interests, positions and needs
  6. Different levels of education and intelligence
  7. Different objections to change

As the following objections to coaching often arise, dissolving these objections is part of systemic coaching. The objections may be verbalized, but are more often shown as body language. An effective coach must be both sensitive to unconscious communication and skilled in dissolving these objections.

  1. Procrastination
  2. Distrust of coach
  3. Chronic anxiety or fear of change
  4. Unpleasant reactions to "soft-skills" training
  5. Unpleasant reactions arising from prior relationship damage

Many people with communication problems have told us that they were not properly parented. They often complained that they were not loved in the right way, or not long enough, or that their parents were absent or preoccupied. They often have many behaviors associated with emotional incest, and may act like adolescent children in adult bodies. We often help such people dissolve their fixations.

See: Sexual Solutions, Relationship Bonds and Sexual Abuse

Do you want private coaching or professional training? We can train you to coach people to resolve complex emotional and relationship challenges.

Online Coaching & Mentorship

Plagiarism is theft. Copyright © Martyn Carruthers, 1998-2018
All rights reserved.

If you like our work, please link to us. If you know someone who might benefit,
please mention or

For online help, email us at:

Soulwork systemic coaching in America & Hawaii


Soulwork systemic coaching in England, Wales & Scotland

Soulwork systemic coaching in Croatia & Serbia

Soulwork systemic coaching in Poland



Have You Suffered Enough?

 Where are you now? Understand your emotions, fixations and enmeshments
What do you hope for? Know your goals and stop sabotaging yourself
Do you feel resourceful? Learn to develop your inner resources
Do emotions block you? Relationship problems and mentor damage
Do your beliefs limit you? Change limiting beliefs and end dependence
Do you feel connected? Resolve identity issues to recover lost resources
Is your partner happy? Build healthy partnership (or separate peacefully)
Are your children healthy? Happy parents better manage family problems
Do you want team success? Team leaders and their teams develop together
Do you have complex goals? Specialty coaching, counseling & therapy

Plagiarism is theft. Copyright © Martyn Carruthers 1996-2018  All rights reserved. Soulwork Systemic Coaching was primarily developed by Martyn Carruthers to help people solve emotional problems and relationship conflicts to achieve their goals. These concepts and strategies are for general knowledge only. Consult a physician about medical conditions and before changing medical treatment. Don't steal intellectual property ... get permission to post, publish or teach Martyn's work - email