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Emotional Issues
Anger & Rage

Eating Problems
Emotional Maturity
Grief & Loss
Inner Child

Pain Control
Stress Relief

Toxic Beliefs
Trauma & Stress
Weight Loss


Relationship Problems

Dissolve Conflicts
Emotional Blackmail

Enjoy Partnership
Evaluate Partners
Long-Distance Love
Love & Hate

Past Partners
Sexual Issues
Soul Mates


Family Challenges

Brothers & Sisters
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Fathers & Daughters
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Mothers & Sons

Parental Alienation


Life Lessons
Bad Habits
Being Alone
Children's Challenges
Observing Feelings

Patterns in Love
Personal Growth
Quantum Leap
Self Esteem
Self Improvement
Self Intimacy
Stress & Relaxing
Therapist and Clients


Chaos Coaching

Inner Conflict
Expert Modeling
Learning Disorders

Sexual Abuse
Soul of Soulwork
Systemic Management
Therapist Abuse
Training Abuse



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Training Employees & Trainer Damage
Martyn Carruthers

Online Coaching with Martyn

Coaches, consultants, trainers and motivational speakers can help your organization ... or they can damage your organization. While some coaching and training offers little more than temporary disturbance, Systemic Solutions can help turn your company around.

Performance, Credibility & Leadership

Do you want to improve your organization's products or services? Your choices may include:

  • train internal coaches
  • hire external consultants
  • improve existing coaching / mentor programs

Maintaining your performance and credibility is an ongoing challenge. Your employees need to see you keeping your promises. This is part of building trust and long-term loyalty.

If you promise and don't deliver, you will get into trouble. If you say that your new concept / program / layout or management fad will save time or effort, your employees will want to believe you - the first time. If your concept fails, your employees will blame you, and may question your judgment and distrust your leadership.

If you are considering bringing in a coach, trainer or motivational speaker ... ask yourself:

  1. What do you really want?
  2. What do your employees really want?
  3. What do your boss / shareholders really want?
  4. Can you clean up any mess you create?

What do you hope for?

If you present a coach, trainer, consultant or motivational speaker to employees as a valued expert, your credibility is on the line. You create expectations ... and some people may be disappointed. Perhaps the expert offers little practical content, just the latest buzz-words and some theoretical abstractions. Or perhaps some of your employees feel manipulated, or pressured.

Read Dilbert cartoons for more about this problem. Do your staff have Dilbert cartoons on their notice boards? Do you want to be another "pointy-haired manager"? If you lose credibility - immediately work to rebuild it. We offer solutions.

You may get into trouble if you arrange coaching that does not reflect your organizational culture. For example, do you REALLY want innovative and motivated employees? Does your company REALLY want assertive and creative staff? Do your managers know how to attract, cultivate and inspire such people? Many managers want quiet, obedient, long-term employees.

Jack W. was a quiet computer programmer. His boss arranged assertiveness coaching for him and told him to attend it. Jack became not assertive but aggressive. His co-workers complained that he had become "difficult to work with". Further coaching did not undo the damage and Jack was fired.

Damage by Therapists . Damage by Mentors

Assessment & Intervention

Following coaching, training or consulting, assess the impact. Evaluate change in your employees behavior. Do their new behaviors lead to profit or loss? While you can give space for employees to learn ... you are responsible for company assets as well as human assets.

  1. Is their new behavior effective?
  2. Does their new behavior encourage teamwork?
  3. Is their new behavior safe to themselves and others?
  4. Does their new behavior have acceptable ethical or legal consequences?

1 Is their new behavior effective - or problematic?
You are wise to evaluate and to intervene before anybody is hurt. You can't always let people "learn from mistakes". Explain the potential consequences of their behavior and suggest alternatives. If possible, let your employees decide which alternative is best.

2 Does their new behavior encourage or damage teamwork?
You are wise to intervene if a team member is doing something that may cause other team members to exclude him or her from the team. Is a team member trying to take credit for a teams' work, or making other members to do their own work, or generally disturbing other team members? You can suggest alternatives and require appropriate teamwork behavior.

3 Are they using safe or unsafe solutions?
You are wise to intervene if employees are trying to solve problems, but their solutions are unsafe or are not working. Arrange coaching that works.

4 Does their new behavior have positive or negative ethical or legal consequences?
You are wise to intervene before someone does something that is illegal or unethical. Explain why the behavior is a poor choice and suggest alternatives. Let them decide which is best.

Coaching Coaches

Do you want to be a successful coach? We can coach you to add systemic coaching to your skills.

  • Show concrete results
  • Demonstrate your coaching
  • Offer experiences of coaching
  • Offer proof that you can deliver
  • Show that you understand needs
  • Show that your goals are aligned with their lives
  • Offer flexible, cost-effective and convenient steps
  • Show where people are now, and where they can be

Do you want effective internet coaching or training? Do you want to solve complex relationship problems? Do you want to coach organizations to get results?

Online Coaching with Martyn


If you like our work, please link to us. If you know someone who might benefit,
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For online help, email us at:

Soulwork systemic coaching in America & Hawaii


Soulwork systemic coaching in England, Wales & Scotland

Soulwork systemic coaching in Croatia & Serbia

Soulwork systemic coaching in Poland



Have You Suffered Enough?

 Where are you now? Understand your emotions, fixations and enmeshments
What do you hope for? Know your goals and stop sabotaging yourself
Do you feel resourceful? Learn to develop your inner resources
Do emotions block you? Relationship problems and mentor damage
Do your beliefs limit you? Change limiting beliefs and end dependence
Do you feel connected? Resolve identity issues to recover lost resources
Is your partner happy? Build healthy partnership (or separate peacefully)
Are your children healthy? Happy parents better manage family problems
Do you want team success? Team leaders and their teams develop together
Do you have complex goals? Specialty coaching, counseling & therapy

Plagiarism is theft. Copyright Martyn Carruthers 1996-2018  All rights reserved. Soulwork Systemic Coaching was primarily developed by Martyn Carruthers to help people solve emotional problems and relationship conflicts to achieve their goals. These concepts and strategies are for general knowledge only. Consult a physician about medical conditions and before changing medical treatment. Don't steal intellectual property ... get permission to post, publish or teach Martyn's work - email