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Relationship Coaching & Systemic Coach Training
Change Emotional Blocks and Relationship Problems © Martyn Carruthers

Online Life Coaching, Counseling & Soulwork Therapy

Are you entangled in difficult relationships or painful emotions? Do you suffer from childhood trauma? Do you suffer from your parents' drama, your partner's demands, your children's moods? Soulwork We can help you untangle your life and reclaim your freedom.

Are You Under Attack?

Have you forgotten your dreams? Has self-limitation become so embedded into your everyday life that you ignore happiness and only pursue distractions? Are you told when to start work, when to stop and when to eat? Do you rush to a job you dislike and then rush home to chores you don’t want to do?

Do you buy mindlessly, programmed by hypnotic advertising and relentless promotion? Do you eat without thought, filling your body with processed foods? Do you relate automatically, repeating the behaviors of your parents or copying actors scripts from TV and movies? Are you really alive?

Are you besieged by conflicting, contradictory and useless advice? In many countries, parental mentorship is being replaced by television, music and cinema. Poor relationship advice can harm your relationships, your children and you. Instead of building long-term happiness, you may settle for short-term fun - for more distractions and addictions. Most people do.

Good relationship coaching can help you improve your relationships; with your partner, your family, your team and your community. Our systemic coaching can help you manage your relationship problems, symbiosis and codependence. You can learn how to create and maintain space for love.

Relationship Coaching Questions

  1. Can systemic coaching really improve your relationships?
  2. How can we coach your relationships?
  3. Who provides relationship coaching?
  4. Is one relationship coach as good as another?
  5. How can good relationship coaching benefit you?
  6. Should you guess about your relationship problems?
  7. Is relationship coaching a wise investment?
  8. What problems can you change with a good relationship coach?

Evolution of Systemic Coaching . Comparison of Coaching Styles

Relationship Coaching Answers

1. Can relationship coaching really improve your relationships?
Yes. Systemic coaching focuses on goals and results. We don't just talk about problems. Systemic coaching helps you evaluate and change your everyday life. Your decisions and subsequent actions are needed for your success.

Ultimately, your results depend on you. No trick can automatically improve your relationships. A coach will not solve your problems for you, or stop you feeling depressed about depressing situations. A good coach can help you define your goals and fulfill them. A systemic coach can teach you how to express yourself appropriately. Your happiness requires your participation!

2. How can we coach your relationships?
A good relationship coach provides efficiency and results. You can learn how to change your behavior to build long-term happiness. While some conditions change with each relationship, people who use proven relationship skills can improve the quality and quantity of their lives.

3. Who provides relationship coaching?
Systemic coaching may include marital counseling, premarital coaching, couple therapy etc. Your decisions about your relationship coaching may depend on:

  • What are your relationship problems?
  • What is your relationship history?
  • How are your current relationships?
  • How important is happiness to you?
  • How is your financial success?
  • Do you see coaching as a luxury or as an investment?

4. Is one relationship coach as good as another?
No. The quality of relationship coaches vary considerably. Check a coach's age, experience and proven results. Many young, single people calling themselves a relationship coach lack personal experience in commitment, parenthood or dedicated teamwork.

5. How can good relationship coaching benefit you?
A good relationship coach can help you diagnose and clarify your problems, clarify your goals, improve your skills, change your beliefs, resolve your conflicts, manage your transferences, manage your entanglements, encourage your decisions, ... and a lot more.

6. Should you guess about solving your relationship problems?
Poor coaching focuses only on symptoms. Good coaching focuses on your goals. It can show you how to identify how you caused your problems and how to resolve or change your relationship habits.

7. Is quality relationship coaching a wise investment?
Much relationship coaching may be better than nothing. The main reason is that a coach may over-use simple questions and avoid complex relationship habits. Some coaching styles are enthusiastically reviewed by young, self-serving writers who do not appreciate the difficulties of long-term relationships.

You can best benefit from coaching and mentorship from people who are trained and experienced in many forms of relationships. As relationships can influence all of your life, a relationship coach should be competent in (at least) individual, family, team, couple and parenthood coaching.

8. What problems can a systemic coach handle?
Besides personality evaluation and relationship diagnosis, a good systemic coach can recognize, discuss and coach responsible people to sort out:

  • Attachments to past partners
  • Codependence and emotional incest
  • Issues about morals, ethics and integrity
  • Relationship decisions; simple and complex conflicts
  • Relationship diagnosis: planning and skill deficiencies
  • Poor quality advice (from parents, friends, teachers, etc)
  • Family and societal influences (limitations on happiness)
  • Past and present relationships (confusion of relationship types)
  • Emotional trauma (often a source of anger, sadness and fear)
  • Family entanglements, transferences, projections and guilt issues

Emotional Incest . Mother-Son Bonds . Father-Daughter Bonds

Relationship questions for you:

  1. Do you accept yourself as you are?
  2. What is your relationship history and habits?
  3. Do you know how healthy relationships work?
  4. Do you know what habits you want to change?
  5. Do you know what qualities you want to develop
  6. What are your personal, partnership and family goals?
  7. Do you know what you want in your important relationships?
  8. Do you know your relationship needs and how to fulfill them?
  9. Can you recognize potential friends, team-workers and partners?
  10. Do you want lasting happiness ... or just distractions from a boring life?

Only you can assess your answers. Only you can decide to keep on repeating your habits or to risk managing your emotions, changing limiting beliefs and improving your relationships skills. When you want healthy and happy relationships - the way out is the way through.

Do you want to manage relationship challenges?
Do you want relationship coaching or systemic coach training?

Online Life Coaching & Mentorship

I thought you were just another therapist - but you were not just. Not even. Not only.

Plagiarism is theft. Copyright © Martyn Carruthers 2005-2018
All rights reserved.

If you like our work, please link to us. If you know someone who might benefit,
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Soulwork systemic coaching in America & Hawaii


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Soulwork systemic coaching in Poland



Have You Suffered Enough?

 Where are you now? Understand your emotions, fixations and enmeshments
What do you hope for? Know your goals and stop sabotaging yourself
Do you feel resourceful? Learn to develop your inner resources
Do emotions block you? Relationship problems and mentor damage
Do your beliefs limit you? Change limiting beliefs and end dependence
Do you feel connected? Resolve identity issues to recover lost resources
Is your partner happy? Build healthy partnership (or separate peacefully)
Are your children healthy? Happy parents better manage family problems
Do you want team success? Team leaders and their teams develop together
Do you have complex goals? Specialty coaching, counseling & therapy

Plagiarism is theft. Copyright © Martyn Carruthers 1996-2018  All rights reserved. Soulwork Systemic Coaching was primarily developed by Martyn Carruthers to help people solve emotional problems and relationship conflicts to achieve their goals. These concepts and strategies are for general knowledge only. Consult a physician about medical conditions and before changing medical treatment. Don't steal intellectual property ... get permission to post, publish or teach Martyn's work - email