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The Relationship Coaching Institute

Solutions for Managing Anxiety

Advanced Systemic Solutions with Martyn Carruthers

Anxiety, Fear & Worry

Do you often feel anxious about your health? Do you feel overwhelming fear about uncertain finances? Do you worry unduly about family or work problems?

Our systemic coaching can help you control or end fears and anxiety.

We present interactive seminars and workshops on systemic coaching, anxiety, team problems and relationship challenges. Contact us if you want coaching or training.

Anxiety Disorders (Panic Attacks)

Anxiety disorders are more than worrying. If you worry constantly, even when nothing is wrong; if you can't relax; if you constantly expect the worst - either in all of your life or in some context - you may have symptoms of an anxiety disorder. It's not your fault. And you cannot just decide to stop.

If you worry a lot, your muscles may get tense and sore. You feel tired. People may call you irritable or grouchy. It may be hard for you to concentrate, to relax or even to sleep. You may not even know what you are worried about. If you feel so afraid, you may also feel depressed.

Anxiety symptoms often begin in childhood, but can start in adults. More women seem to suffer from anxiety than men, and anxiety seems to run in families. Some anxiety problems are due to food allergies; and some due to relationship chaos. Anxiety disorders often lessen with age.

Health Anxiety

If you feel anxious about your health, you probably wish that you didn't. You may have health anxiety. Although many medical professionals and drug salespeople are happily obsessed with other people's health, few health professionals can relate to people with health anxiety. They may accuse you of exaggerating - and they may call you hypochondriac, malingerer or liar.

[ Obsessions and Compulsions . Addictions ]

Some people interpret body sensations as evidence of serious disease (hypochondria). Some people invent medical symptoms to avoid work, to qualify for disability payments or to evade military service (malingering). Some people lie about their health (Munchausen), often to manipulate people into showing care.

If you feel neglected or if you want more control, you may invent symptoms to help you get what you want ... and you may enjoy deceiving medical professionals. Then you may feel stronger instead of weak. Health anxiety is also associated with post-traumatic stress (PTSD) and eating disorders.

[ Trauma and PTSD . Eating Disorders ]

Hypochondria: Worried Sick?

Hypochondria is a persistent irrational fear that you are suffering, or will suffer, from a serious medical condition. You may think that you have heart problems, cancer or some serious disease - and that your doctor is not trying hard enough.

You may feel dizziness, swelling, palpitations or pain. But you can can misread these symptoms, and distrust medical professionals. You may interpret normal signs (like headache, dizziness, fatigue etc) as dangerous. This may be connected to loneliness, depression, guilt or a preoccupation with death.

If you believe that your body is defective or deformed - you may suffer from Body Dismorphic Disorder. You may use phantom defects to justify a depressed lifestyle. Endless reassurance or even plastic surgery are unlikely to ease your bad feelings.

  "Most hypochondriac people will never go to a psychiatrist," said Dr Arthur Barsky (Harvard Medical School). "They'll say, 'I don't want to talk about this, I want another biopsy, I want that CAT scan repeated.' "

[ Schizophrenia . Depression . Bipolar Disorder . Stress ]

Social Phobia - Social Anxiety Disorder

You may have social phobia (social anxiety disorder) if you dread being judged, criticized, and evaluated. You may think that your fear is irrational; yet anxiety persists.

If you have social phobia you find it difficult to be with people ("What are they thinking about me; maybe they don't like me"). You may attract attention to yourself or even try to be the center of attention ("They don't like what I'm doing; am I making a fool of myself?"). You feel insecure and self-conscious in most social settings.

GAD - Generalized Anxiety Disorder

Non-stop anxiety! You are constantly worried or afraid. You may even worry in your dreams. You may have muscle pains and headaches, you may feel constantly tired and yet you cannot seem to relax. You may sweat a lot, even at night. You may feel that you might vomit.

If you have generalized anxiety disorder you may find it difficult to leave your home. ("What will happen? Maybe something terrible"). You may be afraid of "losing it" in public. You may feel insecure in all parts of your life and be diagnosed as agoraphobic.

Systemic Solutions for Anxiety

Anxiety often follows a systemic imbalance in a family. If a family member takes risks, for the benefit of the family, the family may not acknowledge the member for taking those risks. If so, some other family member - most often a female child - may identify with that ignored hero - and express the fear that the ignored hero could not express. We call this Hero Identification ... and we offer help.

The context in which anxiety is expressed often relates to a trauma in which an anxious person expresses an ignored hero's fear. An example was a prostitute who supported a poor family, but the (religious) family claimed that a rich relative was sending them money. The prostitute's younger sister became extremely anxious. We would say that she expressed the fear of the elder sister. This anxiety was fully resolved within eight hours of systemic coaching.

Another example was a man who was involved with a cult-like organization. His teenage son was assumed to have an anxiety disorder - the son's symptoms vanished following about six hours of systemic family coaching.

Systemic coaching can help many people with anxiety disorders, leading to more calmness and improved functioning. Systemic solutions may include individual and couple coaching, and family therapy. Soulwork can help people with anxiety disorders to change inappropriate thoughts, manage motivations and get what they want.

Soulwork can reduce the levels of stress and distress within a family that may either contribute to or result from the expressed symptoms. Systemic coaching can help you change how you think about, and react to, situations in which you feel anxious or fearful. You can change how you respond to worrying situations.

Our systemic coaching helps people to improve their relationships, achieve their life goals, dissolve inner conflicts and manage their emotions. Our systemic coaching can also dissolve toxic relationship bonds, unresolved trauma and abusive and toxic mentorship.

Doctors often treat the consequences of relationship problems with medication. Antidepressants and anti-anxiety drugs (benzodiazepines & beta-blockers) are commonly prescribed.

Consult your physician about any opinions or recommendations about medical symptoms or other medical questions.

Do you want relationship coaching or systemic coach training? We can train you to coach individuals, partners and teams to resolve a wide range of emotional, educational and relationship challenges.


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The Relationship Coaching Institute
 
 
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America: PO Box 675, Honaunau, Hawaii, 96726 USA

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For Systemic Solutions, email us at

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+1 808 328 9570

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+1 905 664 8844

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+38 591 881 2682

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Workshop

Systemic Coach Training  (Calendar)

Systems 1 How to evaluate relationship dynamics and recognize common entanglements
Systems 2 How to define life goals, identify blocks, resolve objections & plan for success
Systems 3 How to provide or continue goalwork using interactive metaphors and Dreamwork
Systems 4 How to dissolve the consequences of abuse and trauma, and rebuild motivation
Systems 5 How to change limiting beliefs and codependence for emotional freedom
Systems 6 How to recognize and resolve identity loss: recover lost qualities and lost skills
Systems 7 How to resolve therapist or spiritual damage and provide inspirational mentorship
Systems 8 How to coach partners to build lasting happiness and avoid partnership breakdown
Systems 9 How to coach parents to resolve family problems and to set and enjoy family goals
Systems 10 How to coach team leaders to develop teams while solving team problems
Specialty Advanced workshops and specialty training tailored to fulfill your goals and needs

Copyright © Martyn Carruthers 1996-2009 All rights reserved. These Systemic Solutions were primarily developed by Martyn Carruthers. We coach and train people to succeed by solving emotional and relationship problems. This information is for your general knowledge only. Please consult a physician about medical conditions and before changing any medical treatment. Link to our pages, but get Martyn's written permission to post or publish his work.

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