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Systemic Coaching & Coach Training

Online Life Coaching, Counseling & Soulwork Therapy

We offer support, structure and accountability to people
who want to define and fulfill their success. Jan Sikorski

Soulwork Coaching

Like counselors, we assist personal development. Like consultants, we are goal oriented and we help people find ways to fulfill their goals. Like therapists, we help people manage emotional and relationship blocks to success. Like trainers, we encourage and support success. Like mentors, we can provide long-term support for reaching complex goals.

A systemic coach is different to a counselor, consultant, therapist, trainer or mentor in that a we do not provide your goals, or your steps to them. A systemic coach provides process expertise, helping you find and use your own resources, which includes finding and using your ability to find and use your other resources!

The Personal and Professional Coaches Association defines coaching as an "ongoing relationship which focuses on clients taking action toward the realization of their vision, goals or desires. Coaching uses enquiry and personal discovery to build the client's level of awareness and responsibility, and to provide clients with structure, support and feedback."

Coaching by Telephone and Skype

Are you confused or broken? Do you want coaching or therapy? The following table is adapted from Therapist as Life Coach: Transforming Your Practice by Dr. Patrick Williams, Ed.D, MCC.

Coaching Psychotherapy
For healthy people who desire better situations For patients with identifiable dysfunctions
Deals mostly with a personís goals and blocks and seeks to help people enjoy better futures Deals mostly with a patient's past trauma, and seeks to heal people
Helps people learn new skills and tools to build more satisfying successful futures Helps patients manage old pain and suffering
Co-creative equal partnership (coaches help people explore their blocks and solve their problems) Doctor-patient relationship (a therapist provides the diagnosis and the solutions)
Assumes emotions are natural and normal Assumes emotions are unnatural and abnormal
Growth and progress are often rapid and enjoyable Growth and progress are often slow and painful
A coach helps people identify their goals and blocks, then walks with them to success, holding people accountable for reaching their own goals. A therapist provides professional expertise and guidelines to diagnose problems and provide a path to healing.

We can coach you to manage whatever underlying issues that prevent you solving your own problems. Your underlying issues are usually relationship issues that reflect your family or organizations or systems within which you live and work.

Our coaching usually begins with an initial phone call, and then a goal-setting session of one or two hours. Your momentum and focus are maintained with weekly appointments until you reach your goals. We together determine the agenda for each session, within an overall progression:

  •  Goalwork and Planning
  •  Relationship Diagnosis
  •  Clarification
  •  Resolve Conflicts
  •  Find Integrity
  •  Relationship Bonds
  •  Emotional Trauma
  •  Mentorship

Often your coach may not live in your community or even in your country. This means that your coach is not part of the systems within which you live and work, providing you with distance, objectivity and perspective.

Working Together

Together, we can define how we can support your success. We do not define how things should be, instead helping you clarify what is happening now, and what you want. Probably, one of your key questions is: "What is the best use of your coaching time?"

Your coach won't have all your answers. Yet, by not knowing, the coach helps you find a clarity, control and responsibility. Your systemic coach helps you define and perhaps challenge your own rules. As you gain clarity, your goals and action steps often become obvious.

What do we provide?

We provide a safe space that allows you time to evaluate what is happening, to establish your evidence for success, and to choose future steps. A coach does not judge results, and expects you to take responsibility and to develop your flexibility to resolve any emotional conflicts.

We provide structure. Your coach asks questions, asks for action and holds you accountable for taking the agreed steps.

We provide feedback. This helps you evaluate your situation and find opportunities for you to move forward.

Coaching Questions

We often ask simple questions. "How do you want to do that?" "What is your next step?" You choose what actions to take and what decisions to make.

Your solutions are always better than your coach's solutions. You are THE expert about your goals. A lot of planning is simply remembering what you want and choosing an appropriate sequence.

How long is a Coaching Relationship?

Some of us require an initial commitment of one month to one year. Coaching helps you develop your flexibility and accountability that make your coach redundant. After you complete your work, you can arrange monthly or quarterly feedback sessions.

Putting it Together

We begin our coaching with your goals. Useful goals are specific and positively stated without unconscious objections. Such goals help you specify your dreams and plan for success. A coach can help you fine tune negative goals, abstract goals and conflicting goals.

  • Your coach can help you decide "what to do next".
  • Your coach helps you explore your blocks and find breakthroughs.
  • Your coach will carefully listen to your words - and to your body language.
  • Your coach helps you change self-imposed limits and challenge your limits.
  • Your coach can help you heal wounds, realize dreams and have a better life.

After a session I felt that I had all the answers and that I did the work. You asked me good questions and you provoked me to find my own answers. Scotland

I learned to define what I want and then to get it. I learned to change my beliefs and take action. You did not change me, you showed me how I could change myself. You encouraged me to trust myself, and you expected me to reach my goals. New York

Advanced Soulwork (Identity Blocks, Relationship Bonds, Trauma and Mentorship) is the best coach training I have ever attended ... your earlier courses (Family Matrix, Goalwork and Integrity) provided a good basis for the advanced skills. Poland

Our Coach Training

We offer coaching, coach training and certification. We can help you gain essential skills to assess and change the behavior of people in families, marriages, businesses and other relationship systems. Contact us for fast results.

Online Coaching, Counseling & Soulwork Therapy

I thought you were just another therapist - but you were not just. Not even. Not only.

Plagiarism is theft. Copyright © Jan Sikorski 1996-2018
All rights reserved.

If you like our work, please link to us. If you know someone who might benefit,
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For online help, email us at:

Soulwork systemic coaching in America & Hawaii


Soulwork systemic coaching in England, Wales & Scotland

Soulwork systemic coaching in Croatia & Serbia

Soulwork systemic coaching in Poland



Have You Suffered Enough?

 Where are you now? Understand your emotions, fixations and enmeshments
What do you hope for? Know your goals and stop sabotaging yourself
Do you feel resourceful? Learn to develop your inner resources
Do emotions block you? Relationship problems and mentor damage
Do your beliefs limit you? Change limiting beliefs and end dependence
Do you feel connected? Resolve identity issues to recover lost resources
Is your partner happy? Build healthy partnership (or separate peacefully)
Are your children healthy? Happy parents better manage family problems
Do you want team success? Team leaders and their teams develop together
Do you have complex goals? Specialty coaching, counseling & therapy

Plagiarism is theft. Copyright © Martyn Carruthers 1996-2018  All rights reserved. Soulwork Systemic Coaching was primarily developed by Martyn Carruthers to help people solve emotional problems and relationship conflicts to achieve their goals. These concepts and strategies are for general knowledge only. Consult a physician about medical conditions and before changing medical treatment. Don't steal intellectual property ... get permission to post, publish or teach Martyn's work - email