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Daddy’s Little Princess (Part 1)

Father - Daughter Bonds & Entanglements

Are you entangled with your father?
Are you entangled with a woman who is entangled with her father?

Do you know a woman who:

  • cannot maintain a partnership?
  • is immature - never grows up?
  • forever tries to appear special?
  • deceives and betrays people?
  • may behave like a spoiled child
  • may sabotage other people's relationships
  • attracts emotionally immature men
  • may prefer codependent relationships

These are signs of father-bonded women. These are some signals of emotional chaos - for the women and for people involved with them. Help is available.

Entangled Parents - Entangled Children

When parents do not fulfill parental responsibilities, or love their children as substitutes for other relationships, their children may suffer emotional entanglements. Entangled children have difficulty expressing their own identities - and may express identity loss as aggression, learning disabilities and obsessions. Later, as adults, they often enmesh their own children with dysfunctional parenting and emotional incest.

Adult Woman or Little Girl?

A woman who is entangled with her father is often unable to maintain a stable partnership. Such a woman may avoid partnership by attempting to rescue father, attempting to rescue immature or addicted men - or by avoiding available mature men. See Teenager in Trouble

Substitute & Fantasy Fathers

If a father is dead, absent or irresponsible, a daughter may adopt a male relative as a substitute - perhaps a brother, uncle or grandfather. Or a daughter may create a fantasy father - a fantasy who provides the missing love. An entanglement with a fantasy father may help a fatherless daughter cling to health and sanity; although later, she may seek a substitute for that fantasy.

Parental Responsibilities

Situations that produce people who express entangled or codependent behavior include:

  • A parent is absent or dead - and the other parent is immature, lost or lonely
  • A parent is irresponsible or childish and cannot provide mature guidance
  • A parent is an addict, obsessed, brain damaged, psychotic or insane
  • A parent is displaced or controlled by another family member (behaves like a victim)
  • A parent loves a child in ways that later depress the child's life

Emotional Incest

Emotional Incest is common. Soulwork systemic coaching can resolve intra-family codependence and attachment disorders. We help motivated people find emotional freedom and build lasting happy partnerships, by dissolving relationship bonds and entanglements.

Love at First Sight provides endless examples of entanglements and transferences. You can read more about entanglements and toxic parenting at Learning Disabilities. Emotional incest between mothers and sons is described at Little Prince.

Excluded Mothers

When Daughter bonds to Father, Mother may may react with anger and irritation. Mother may try to punish Father and Daughter for their betrayal - or retreat into depression and victim-hood. Whether Mother fights or rejects of ignores Father and Daughter, the situation will likely worsen. Systemic coaching can clarify complex family relationships and provide effective solutions.

Disenfranchised Fathers

Many helping professionals may strive to involve a mother in family problems and give less attention to fathers. Instead of treating fathers as an equal parents whose involvement is needed by their families, helping professionals may demean them, and may devalue the father’s importance to his family.

Relationship Bonds . Parent Coaching . Parental Alienation

Daddy's Little Princess

Family relationships in “the West” may be considered abnormal or aberrant in other cultures, and vice versa. Relationship Coaching provides a cross-cultural perspective; and can dissolve the consequences of attachment disorders and toxic relationship bonds in many cultures. The consequences include:

  • physical or mental disease
  • partnership chaos
  • sick and depressed children
  • miscarriages and crib deaths
  • work and money problems
  • anxiety and stress disorders

Emotional Incest: Parent-Child Codependence

F
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E
D
B
A
C
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"I married a man with a teenage daughter. She was hostile, but the father believed that once she understood how much he loved me, she would come around. But she did not want me in her life or his life. My husband kept saying that I was like his daughter. I felt he was trying to make me into an older version of her. When my opinions or attitudes were different than his daughter's, he found fault with me. I tried to make our marriage work, but his love for me evaporated into a list of faults that echoed his daughter's complaints. It took me forever to admit that there was something very unhealthy about their relationship and his emotional abuse."

Mother-Son Bonding, is equally common, equally predictable and equally toxic. If father-daughter and mother-son entanglements occur in a family simultaneously – you can expect generations of suffering.

Daddy's Princess - Part 2

Letter from an American Teenage Girl (2004)

if a father is over-loving a daughter as you mentioned in your website. and the mother feel rejected or left out . tahts her problem!!! she has got to deal with it on her own. its not her child or her husbands fault that they love eachtoher. she has just got to deal with it. if she cant she can leave. as far as a kids point of you ... we dont care. one honest loving parent is more than enough. if a mother doenst even know her place.. well thats too bad. some kids love both and all are happy. sometimes kids choose a parent. the other parent has got to deal with it.

Please email us your comments

Soulwork provides effective coaching, coach training and mentorship for emotional incest and family entanglements. We train professional coaches to coach individuals, partners and teams to resolve a range of emotional, educational and relationship challenges.

Plagiarism is theft. Copyright © Martyn Carruthers 1999, 2005. All right reserved.

 

 
 

 

Training Centers & Programs
We offer systemic coach training to helping professionals
and to people who want healthy relationships and happy families.

Good Questions

Good Answers

Good Training

1. Where are you now in your life? Assess fixations, bonds and enmeshments Systems 1
2. What do you want?  Define life goals ... and blocks to success Systems 2
3. How can you reach your goals?  Use conscious and unconscious resources Systems 3
4. Do your emotions limit you?  Dissolve abuse, trauma and mentor damage Systems 4
5. Do your beliefs block you? Change limiting beliefs to end dependence Systems 5
6. Does inner emptiness limit you? Resolve identity loss to recover qualities and skills Systems 6
7. Do you want happy partnership? Build healthy partnership (or separate peacefully) Systems 7
8. Do you want healthy children? Coach parents to resolve family problems Systems 8
9. Do you want team success? Coach team leaders and top teams ... together Systems 9
10. Do you want community? Coach community leaders and communities Systems 10
**   Do you have unusual goals? Specialty coaching & training for unusual goals Specialty

What is Hawaiian Shamanism?

One root of our systemic magic Huna 1-6

Plagiarism is theft. Copyright © Martyn Carruthers 1996-2011 All rights reserved. Soulwork Systemic Coaching was primarily developed by Martyn Carruthers
to help people dissolve emotional blocks, improve relationships and achieve goals. These concepts and strategies are for general knowledge only. Consult a physician about medical conditions and before changing medical treatment. Don't steal intellectual property ... ask for permission to post, publish or teach this work.