Do you want to end depression?
Depression can be a time to evaluate,
"What makes sense in life?"
Many people attempt to use drugs as a substitute for solving
relationship problems. Alcohol, nicotine and anti-depressants seem easier than
solving guilt issues.
Consequences of Depression
If you feel depressed for
more than a few days,
we recommend that you talk to a medical doctor
especially if you consider harming yourself or others.
Depression is part of life. Depression
affects about 10% of the world population - there are about three million
depressed people in England alone. We find that common causes of
depression are not an economic crisis so much as
relationship problems and lives without meaning.
If you have healthy relationships and a sense of
purpose - an economic crisis or recession are just other problems to solve!
If you feel anxiety about your family or worried about
aging, sex drive or thinning hair, it's easier to blame some crisis for limiting your enjoyment of life. Why not fix the real problem?
Depression can contribute to bedroom problems such as
impotence (erectile dysfunction in men and frigidity
in women). Depressed people can damage or destroy their partnerships and family harmony - increasing their depression.
Depression is also associated with
addiction, living alone, relationship breakdown
and relationship problems. We can help you resolve each
of these, by first finding your real issues.
Depression is the inability to
construct a future
Depression is a
reminder that something important is missing in your life and/or that you need
to change some relationships.
Depression reduces the quality and sense of life, and
often originates in the early family. Depression often starts
as isolation, or in dependent, symbiotic or dysfunctional
relationships. Relationship problems require relationship
solutions (and drugs often seem to delay a search for solutions).
We find that depressed women are more likely to seek help,
while depressed men of any age appear more likely to self-medicate
with alcohol or nicotine, or obsessively distract themselves with television,
pornography, internet surfing or gambling.
Does your life make sense? Can you enjoy ...
- intimate partnership
- strong supportive beliefs
- a sense of connectedness
- you know what is important
- a sense of purpose or mission
- healthy mind in a healthy body
- your place within your community
- caring for children or projects
You can prevent or remedy depression - or you can deal with its
consequences. We help people build better relationships, plan
their lives, exercise, enjoy sleep and benefit from healthy diets.
People facing alcohol or drug addictions can also seek drug
treatment and recovery programs.
Depression & Drugs
The sale of anti-depressants is a multi-billion
dollar industry. Although the most common anti-depressants may be alcohol
and nicotine, trying to manage depression with addictive prescription drugs
may have consequences worse than depression. Many prescription anti-depressants
are addictive with
unpleasant side effects.
The more expensive anti-depressant drugs are SSRI -
selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors such as Zoloft,
Prozac or Paxil, which increase serotonin in the brain.
Many older and cheaper anti-depressants include MAOI or MonoAmine
Oxidase Inhibitors, with worse side effects.
Symptoms of Depression
People who feel depressed often describe unpleasant moods,
thoughts and self-image. They may have difficulty
making decisions - day-to-day tasks may seem
overwhelming. Check these symptoms ...
- Preoccupied with death or suicide
- Insomnia and/or major sleep changes
- Appetite and/or major weight changes
- Decreased energy, fatigue - always tired
- Little interest in romance or sexual activity
- Feeling hopeless, helpless or pessimistic
- Feeling guilt, worthlessness, helplessness
- Loss of interest or pleasure in work or profession
- Little pleasure in activities that were once enjoyed
- Sadness, anxiety, emptiness, restless and irritable
Depression, Disease & Guilt
Depression seems to be a normal response to unhealthy relationships.
People at higher risk of depression include those suffering
from codependence or
Common issues underlying depression seem to be guilt
and shame, especially if you:
- abused, traumatized or hurt someone
- were abused by someone but you blame yourself
- blame yourself for some misfortune to yourself or to others
- betrayed or abandoned someone important (e.g.
abandoning a child)
Withheld Guilt & Shame
People who try to withhold emotions will sooner or later
express them; either as body symptoms or as relationship drama.
Depression often seems to result from withholding guilt and
may reflect abuse, abandonment, betrayal, etc.
Depression may also follow parental alienation
emotional incest. Do you allow
yourself to be happier than your parents? (Did your family have
You asked if it was OK
for me to be happier than my mother.
I realized that whenever I feel happy, I do stupid
things to upset
husband. Then I don't feel guilty about my mother's depression.
Guilt and shame can be experienced as depression, chronic relationship
problems or nervous breakdown.
Long-term solutions seem to require that people who have hurt others
clarify and balance this hurt, and that they solve any relationship problems, see emotional maturity.
(People facing alcoholism or drug addiction often seek
rehab centers to gain sobriety and overcome these addictions.)
Many people seem to try to control guilt and depression with
distractions (e.g. TV, sex, gambling, etc), medications
(including nicotine, alcohol and caffeine) and dissociation
(withdrawal, self-hypnosis and meditation). Such control is usually
Solutions for Depression: Wisdom & Integrity
Intelligent people may feel
depressed if they cannot find solutions for problems
or trends that less intelligent people do not notice. (Sensitive people may feel depressed by incidents that less
sensitive people consider unimportant.)
Do you want to resolve emotional and relationship issues
Online Systemic Coaching, Counseling & Therapy
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