Do you suffer from immature habits? Are you enmeshed in negative emotions?
Do you want to solve relationship problems and reclaim your freedom?
Are you Growing Up - or just Growing Old?
Emotional maturity includes questioning your
proving your abilities and challenging your parents' choices.
Many people seem to stop growing up at some age, and some
adults often behave like children or teenagers (and in some countries that is
normal). A useful question is, "How old do you behave in your
Mature adults tend to solve problems quickly. They cope
with problems - whether children, illness, divorce,
parenthood, careers and unemployment. When they need help -
they find help fast. To assess emotional maturity, you can ask yourself:
- Do you accept reality as it is?
- Do you adapt to changing realities?
- Do you solve your problems promptly?
- Do you cope with losses and setbacks?
- Do you take responsibility for your finances?
- Do you live realistically, conscious of your mortality?
- Do you accept your age and continue your development?
- Do you concern yourself with social problems
- Do you feel good about your successes and enjoy
- Do you stay in integrity, despite temptations,
compromises and conflicts?
Youth fades - immaturity lingers.
Maturity is not a reward for good children or good students.
Maturity isn't part of college graduation or military service.
Most young people have a sense of romance, a precursor of
adult wisdom. Romantic idealism
may be wonderful for teenagers - wisdom, clarity and wit form
a basis for mature decisions. Most children want to play with toys,
most teenagers want to have fun and most adults want to live
meaningful lives. But some adults don't know how.
My husband acts like a teenager.
He walks away unexpectedly, he demands that
I wait on him and he
will not help with housework. We are both university professors
but he often acts like a first year student. How can I make him
grow up? Boston
Few people deliberately sabotage their own happiness. We find
that childhood stress and relationship problems (such as
parental alienation or covert incest) can
cause disorders that persist into adult life.
Maturity doesn't just happen. We coach people to mature.
Childish adults want toys, games and substitutes for parents.
When immature people want help they may act like needy
children or helpless victims. Immature people need mature mentorship
and self-esteem but
seek codependence and instant gratification.
You helped me settle things in
my mind. You showed me that change is not
the end of the world.
Most people do it. It's called growing up. Mexico
Maturity, more than fun, is a prerequisite for lasting happiness,
and we associate it with self-esteem and integrity. Immaturity causes
many relationship problems.
Youth Fades - Immaturity Lingers
We bend our theories to fit people - we do
not bend people to fit our theories!
Immature behavior often seems to follow childhood abuse or
inadequate parenting. Immature people often seem to be stuck
at ages corresponding to their trauma.
We coach people who want to manage their emotions and grow up.
A sign of maturity is that
you can be right without needing to make others wrong.
Mature people can retain many of their youthful strengths.
You can retain your capacity for wonder, pleasure and playfulness,
your affiliation and curiosity, and your idealism and passion.
We can help you recover and integrate these qualities with
your adult maturity, wisdom, knowledge and responsibility -
with your strength and vision.
Another sign of maturity is that you
perceive your parents as ordinary people.
Keys to maturity include
self-esteem, clarity and a stable sense of
integrity. Then, manage negative
emotions and find mentors for living the life you want. We can help
you heal stress disorders, emotional problems and fixations.
Do you believe that you can learn and improve your emotional intelligence,
or is it an inborn characteristic that you are stuck with?
This book "Emotional
Maturity" can help you:
Understand your feelings
Manage your strong emotions
Assess the consequences of your decisions
Martyn, I better understand why
my oldest son had such difficult marriages.
He's nearly 40 but he was just a
teenager inside ... thank you for working with him.
Are you Emotionally Mature or Emotionally Retarded?
People often hide their feelings and deny their emotions.
Many people have only seen immature or emotion-less behavior at home.
They may not know what mature behavior and emotional expressions look
Examples of Maturity
Physical / Biological Maturity
Cognitive / Psychological Maturity
- age of the body
- ability to parent a child
- muscle mass and body shape
- understand different views
- select information from raw data
- apply information with decisions
- liking yourself
- self-control under stress
- responsible for own decisions
- be friendly and share resources
- cooperate with peers and teams
- communicate data and decisions
You can compare a person's emotional control,
decision-making and relationship skills with the requirements
of that person's relationships. See
Emotional Maturity 2
Some Indications of Emotional Maturity
- resourceful under stress
- settles conflicts peacefully
- takes personal responsibility
- can delay gratification of goals
- dependable and resourceful
- perseveres to complete projects
- makes decisions and keeps them
- solves problems without complaining
Part 2 .
Emotional Maturity Test
Do you cause friends and family to suffer because you behave
in immature ways and you won't get help? Contact us.
Online Coaching, Counseling & Soulwork Therapy
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