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Deconditioning, Deprogramming & Exit Coaching

Systemic Solutions with Martyn Carruthers

We present interactive seminars and demonstration-rich workshops on systemic coaching, cults, toxic secrets and relationship bonds. Email us if you are interested in organizing a workshop in your area.

Are you in a cult?

Words like extremist, cult and sect are difficult to define. Many businesses, militaries, government agencies and professional associations can be described as extremist by non-supporters. People supporting a human system such as a political party, religion or commercial organization may describe competing human systems as deviant, regressive, cults or sects.

(Cults promote a new religion or a new interpretation of an established religion, while sects are groups that have broken away from an established religion, often in protest against what they see as corruption or impure doctrine ... Encyclopedia Encarta 2003.)

Cult leaders hate competition

Abrupt and sometimes frightening personality changes may indicate involvement with radical, extremist or fundamental groups that use psychological techniques (often called brainwashing or mind control), to recruit and keep members. This article is for people who want to leave extremist political, religious,  military or commercial organizations (e.g. multi-level marketing), or dysfunctional families - but their leaving is resisted by other members - often by emotional bonding, harassment, blackmail and threats. (Some organizations call their actions patriotism and try to criminalize other points of view.)

Exit coaching is for people whose friends or family are involved in groups that use psychological coercion, programming or hypnosis to increase and maintain membership. Exit coaching is also available for people leaving academic and military organizations, who must reorient to a less regulated and more competitive life. Many students with advanced degrees and career military personnel have problems orienting to the real world of civilian life.

The people most likely to prefer extremist organizations are those who grew up in families typified by codependent behavior (e.g. addictions, obsessions, victims, criminal behavior, suicide, etc). Systemic exit coaching is for people who want to leave cult-like organizations ... but somehow cannot.

Abusive Trainers . Abusive Relationships . Spiritual Abuse

Toxic beliefs & Relationship Bonds

Most conditioning involves installing elitist beliefs. Examples are: "Only we know the truth", "Anyone who harasses us is insane" and "Criticism is proof of regression". Many cult-like organizations attempt to place cult leaders (living or dead) as substitute high-authority "parents" (or Big Brother) in the minds of the members. Other cult members are often called brothers and sisters. Close connections to family and former friends may be discouraged. Members may feel tremendous guilt if they consider leaving their sacred new family.

Psychological Operations . Soul Cult?

Escape from Invisible Prisons

Brainwashing is a propaganda word. Cult brainwashing is better described as a combination of persuasion, propaganda, coercion, conditioning and restricted access to information. Many advertisers, governments, schools and parents use similar, if more subtle, techniques.

Cult conditioning was once fought with deconditioning and deprogramming, which are now associated with illegal, coercive techniques once used to counter brainwashing. These often-brutal methods included abduction, sleep deprivation, sensory overload, shouted condemnation, isolation and sometimes physical confinement. Although some ex-cult-members have said that these methods released them from invisible prisons, others sued the deprogrammers. Coercive deprogramming involves legal and psychological risks, and we do not provide, support nor recommend those methods.

A deeper understanding of human relationships provides safe alternatives. Exit Counseling and Coaching helps distressed family members build healthy relationships.

Dependent Relationships . Space for Love . Soulwork Review

Exit Coaching

"Conditioning" by extremist groups is likely to be both emotional and anti-intellectual. Their activities often involve relationships, slogans and rituals, and avoid intellectual analysis. Exit Coaching evaluates and changes emotionally charged relationships, while assisting people to evaluate factual information about the group they wish to leave.

Exit Coaching is for people who want to change. It is gentle, direct, intensive and time-limited. It emphasizes respectfully sharing information, and it should not be rushed. Freedom of thought and action can be regained.

Exit Coaching is available during office visits, or during intensive multi-day sessions. The total time depends mostly on a person's motivation to be part of the culture in which he or she lives. Often a person changes their lifestyle (their mini-culture) to suit their own goals.

Some cults control their members finances and possessions, and legal expertise may be required. As many extremist groups control members' sexual activity, Exit Coaching supports healthy relationships. (If the group was pro-active about promiscuous sex, then sexually transmitted diseases and/or unwanted pregnancies and/or abortions may complicate the issues.)

Coaching Sexual Issues . Solutions for Sexual Issues . Abortion

Exit coaching is for motivated, responsible people who want to end entanglement with specific group leaders, with a group's beliefs and with a group's activities - they want to enjoy emotional freedom.

Effective Exit Coaching is for motivated people who are rested, alert, responsible and thinking clearly. Exit coaching can be accelerated by family members and former friends who contribute respectful, honest communication.

Exit Coaching helps people resolve traumatic and ritual abuse, substance addictions, crisis, etc.

Helping professionals who wish to learn more about Soulwork Systemic Coaching may be interested in experiential workshops, which are also appropriate for people who wish to redefine their lives.

Do you want relationship coaching or systemic coach training? Do you want to coach people to resolve emotional and relationship challenges?

Plagiarism is theft. Copyright © Martyn Carruthers 2002, 2005 All rights reserved.