Contact us for coaching, counseling and training on family relationships,
family constellations and resolving family problems.
Does your child make choices that concern you?
Can you say "No!" when "No!" is needed?
We help families create healthier and happier lives
together. We coach family members to improve their communication, to
manage emotional problems and to cope with family situations - births,
illnesses, marriages and deaths and the everyday details that make up
our lives .
Families behave much like other human relationship
systems - very few families behave like groups of isolated individuals.
We help people evaluate their family relationships in terms of roles,
responsibilities and the happiness of their members. We help families
solve problems by changing how they work rather than trying to
fix specific members.
Families who do not manage their problematic
traditions or habits can expect these behaviors and consequences to
be duplicated by their children and grandchildren. We sometimes call
this family karma.
Systemic Family Coaching
Your family must cope with predictable problems. Premature deaths,
illnesses, missing family members, accidents or other apparent injustices
will happen. These events do not only impact the daily life of family
members, if handled poorly they can upset family harmony for generations.
The exclusion of family members may not only
hurt and humiliate those being rejected - other family members, perhaps in
a subsequent generation, may try to bring back the missing family
members, either by adoption or marriage, or by identification - by
expressing the emotions and feelings of the missing members.
We help people explore how unjust events affect their health,
susceptibility to disease, and patterns of deaths, accidents
or loss may be repeated in each generation. Our perspective offers
many opportunities for people to understand themselves as well as
their emotions and their relationships.
Medical Doctor's Perspective
Assess Common Interests and Identify Differences
Our work is not only for people with problems - it
is for adults who are motivated for more or better. Most human behavior
is influenced and maintained by relationships - by the way people interact.
We help individual people or whole families to explore and find ways
to change how they behave in families and how families behave in
communities. Our effective yet optimistic approach can help you and
your family cope with a changing world.
- Individual Coaching - skills for success,
health and happiness.
- Couple Coaching: learn skills and solve emotional problems for happy partnership.
- Family Coaching: skills for parents -
child-raising, family habits, learning disabilities, etc
- Corporate Coaching skills for managers and
negotiations; Team Leadership coaching.
- Community Coaching and Trainer Training
are also available.
Predictable Partnership .
Most remedial approaches deal only with symptoms, and not with
systemic roots. Following such interventions, the system renews the
symptom or creates another, continuing to express the dysfunction.
People can be ill from the same illness repetitively, or from
successive similar diseases. Systemic coaching resolves the
fundamental imbalance; until the symptom spontaneously disappears.
Rooted in relationships are: physical illnesses,
compulsive-addictive behavior, mental blocks and repetitive life
crises. Ana Pejcinova, PhD
We cannot help everybody. Our coaching may be too
difficult for people with psychological disorders, or who cling
to their parents' communication habits. Families that
are generally unsuitable for our family coaching include:
- families with members who cannot or will not
- families with members who risk an emotional or
- families whose cultural or religious values are
opposed to outside counseling
We can help family members to:
- end overt and covert abusive behavior
- stop fighting and have more peaceful
- improve their empathy, understanding and
- express what is acceptable and unacceptable
- improve relationships with members who are
perceived as "victims"
- respect other members with personal space,
contact; promises; boundaries
- be fair to all members, irrespective of their
gender, age, birth order, abilities, etc
Some of our Family Resources
Some questions that we often ask about families:
- How close are family members now?
- What would empower all family members?
- What could stop you being happy together?
- What do you want your family to do together?
- How do you want to improve family happiness?
Exploring and answering these questions allows you and your
family to re-evaluate the situation. These questions may seem
simple ... yet your full answers to these questions will likely be
We help people manage emotions and family chaos ... we help people find
solutions for emotional blocks and relationship problems.
family system is an idea that may have taken us all off track. It
is far better to do away with the concept of the family system to which
the treating professional is as active a contributor as anyone else. We
would then not say the system creates the problem, but that the
problem creates the system. In other words, a problem does not exist
independently of the "observing systems" that are reciprocally
and collectively defining the problem.'
Boscolo et al,1987
The interpretation of Soulwork family maps and
huge knowledge about relationship
dynamics and considerable experience, especially with partial personalities
and transferences. Although training
takes a few weeks and proficiency can be gained within a few months,
expertise requires both quality training and years of experience.
We help families change unwanted habits and share responsibility. We coach
people to develop self-esteem and
responsibility, and healthy relationship skills.
- Manage negative emotions
- Dissolve toxic relationship bonds
- Provide or find healthy role models
- Listen, respect and clarify communications
- Build acceptance, trust, empathy and compassion
- Respond appropriately to perceptions and
- Dissolve conflicts and find family integrity
Contact us for online evaluation, coaching and feedback.
The effects are immediate - and unfold over generations.
Online Family Coaching,
Counseling & Soulwork Therapy
I thought you were just
another therapist - but you were not just. Not even. Not only.
Plagiarism is theft. Copyright ©
Martyn Carruthers 2003-2017 All rights reserved