We help people sort out their emotions and
solve relationship problems.
The wonders of modern medicine
pace a decline in contact between
medical staff and their patients. Patients are more often referred to by
their diagnoses -
"Nurse - check the liver cancer in room 6".
Relationships & Disease
Emotional difficulties may
affect metabolic control and affect disease symptoms. We perceive that emotions
reflect relationships and we help
people manage their emotions and solve relationship problems. We
- manage emotions, beliefs and stress
- help patients and family members manage their
- improve relationships with family, friends and
- support healthy behaviors, such as diet and
Relationships with Families, Friends & Professionals
As relationships imply both harmony and differences, relationship conflicts can
indicate healthy relationships. People who hide or avoid conflicts are often insecure
or dependent. Discussions and conflict management are part of all
relationships, whether with babies or a management committee.
Sick people may suffer severe mood swings, but be unaware of them; in each moment acting as if
their current emotion is a basis for long-term decisions.
During these times, their relationships may be under severe stress. Ill people may seem quite normal, yet say horrible things. Strange ideas may be announced as facts or a person may respond to a loving
partner as if to a stranger.
Managing Emotions, Beliefs & Stress
We can assist and support people to deal with emotions associated
with drugs and medications; and to improve the quality of relationships
during difficult and troubling times. Some difficult topics are:
- Survivor guilt
- Death and dying
- Stress and trauma
- Events (triggers) that cause anger, anxiety or sadness
- Beliefs about disease cause, seriousness, treatments
1. Events causing anger, anxiety or sadness
Anger, anxiety and sadness appear to be the primary emotions that many people want to "get rid of", "cut out"
or "throw away". Yet in our coaching, these emotions are
perceived as excellent and accessible doors to explore relationships and
We can help people manage their relationships and change negative emotions.
2. Beliefs about Cause, Seriousness and Treatment
While your beliefs may not be accepted by other people,
they are real to you, and you will likely strive to prove or confirm
your beliefs. If you believe that your disease is a just reward for your
past action, you may not be motivated to heal. If you believe that your
disease is temporary, you may ignore treatment. And if you believe that
your treatment is ineffectual or counter-productive, you may resist it.
We can help people identify, manage and change their limiting beliefs.
People with chronic disease seem more likely to suffer from
depression, and people with depression are at greater risk of
chronic disease. Depression may reduce the desire to follow the prescribed treatment.
Depression may increase blood pressure and blood clotting and can
also lead to elevated cholesterol. These risk factors, with obesity,
form a group of signs and symptoms that often serve as
both a predictor of and a response to heart disease.
Often, an underlying issue is guilt. If a person feels guilty,
life may not make sense, which leads to depression. We can help
people manage guilt from:
- Betrayal or abandonment (e.g. betraying a partner
or abandoning a child)
- Relationship transferences (e.g. perceiving a partner as
a parent or child)
4. Stress & Trauma
Stress influences disease. Emotional stress leads to
the secretion of hormones that can disrupt metabolic control.
Psychological trauma can accompany or follow treatment, for example after
major surgery or mastectomy.
The resulting emotions can disrupt a
personís relationships, eating habits, exercise and daily routines,
and disturb heart disease treatment. A patientís emotional needs and
problems are important components of disease treatment and integral
to disease management.
5. Death, Dying & Grief
Some people with diseases will die. The family, helping
professionals and friends may help prepare a person for this possibility
- or they may avoid informing that person. A difficult decision is how
much psychoactive drugs (usually pain-killing opiates) to administer
during a person's final hours.
We can help people prepare for the death of a
relative or friend, and express appropriate grief.
6. Survivor Guilt
People with life-threatening diseases often form
close communities; bonded by suffering. The community members live under
the threat and expectation of death - and those who survive while others
die may experience an existential crisis, asking "Why should I
live and not them?" Such a crisis may expose guilt and self-esteem issues. If ignored, survivor guilt may lead to depression.
Please consult a medical doctor about medical conditions.
Contact us to resolve success, emotional and relationship
Online Coaching, Counseling & Soulwork Therapy
I thought you were just
another therapist - but you were not just. Not even. Not only.
Plagiarism is theft. Copyright © Martyn Carruthers
All rights reserved