Do you manage your motivation?
Do you diminish or defeat your own goals?
Do you sabotage your own health, wealth or
I enjoy working with motivated people.
Lasting motivation requires
that you deal with any emotional baggage, expose your
and remember your goals and dreams.
Years ago, I taught motivational and stress
workshops. I had good feedback and repeat invitations ... and yet
I stopped. I found that the states of heightened motivation and
decreased stress after a workshop lasted for a few days. I compared notes with other trainers
- and found that a week of heightened motivation was a
Many people avoid crazy, illegal or
dangerous behaviors by procrastination
and low motivation ...
sometimes unmotivated is better than impulsive!
Your ability to manage motivation reflects your
What was the point of wiring people up for few days - only to
see them come back down to earth with a bump or a crash? Some people
seemed worse off than before. So I stopped playing that game. I couldn't make myself repeat rah-rah
motivational mantras. The heck with "Fake it 'til you make it".
Every time you communicate, you
expose your maturity.
A German therapist, Annegret Hallanzy, and I
explored the incredible states of being that she called
Visions and I called Soul. (See Soul of
Soulwork and Psychobiology of Soul.)
We explored how many people de-motivate
themselves with beliefs
that they cannot let themselves recognize.
How do People Sabotage Themselves?
Most self-sabotage is not conscious. You wasted
your time, ignored your happiness and delayed your success, and
later you can't imagine why. You were so close. Maybe you felt a
sudden fatigue or need for distraction. Maybe you criticized yourself or perhaps you let other people diminish
your dreams. You sabotaged yourself.
I built my business to success, but it
became boring. I was watching it fall apart when my wife arranged sessions
for me with you. During our sessions I realized that
I believed that I was most creative and
I was poor.
You helped me change that. Austria
Do other people damage your motivation? Are you bonded to authorities, such as parents, teachers, priests, partners or employers
- who wanted you to live their way and who did not believe that you could
be successful in your own way?
Do You Demotivate Yourself?
Is lack of motivation normal for you? You probably
want to feel normal ... and you might sabotage your life to feel
normal. Do you want to change?
If you prefer to sabotage yourself, you can:
- criticize yourself
- obsess about past errors
- avoid solving your problems
- stay in unpleasant relationships
- avoid coaching and mentorship
- avoid planning a worthwhile future
- not practice activities you want to improve
- hope that negative emotions will just go away
- believe that you are too stupid to enjoy a successful life
- consume things that you know will make you fat, slow or sick
Why do You Sabotage Yourself?
Do you have thoughts like: "I don't stick to my goals; I
don't finish my work on time; I am miserable because I deserve it"?
Although self-sabotage may seem to manifest as thoughts and actions, the
underlying feelings and beliefs are usually based on old
abusive bonds and other relationship problems.
I have built many businesses to a certain
level of success, and then destroyed them.
I repeated this
pattern all my adult life. During our sessions I realized that I could
myself be more successful than my mother. Honolulu, Hawaii
Many people believe that self-sabotage is associated with low self-esteem, low
self-worth, low self-love and low self-confidence, although we find such
comments are often trivial and unhelpful justifications. We find that most self-sabotage reflects
abusive relationships ... particularly
Understanding why some people
have little motivation is not a solution. We help people solve
their emotional issues and change their
I had years of therapy for
depression and low motivation. I learned exactly why I was depressed
low energy ... but I was still miserable and unmotivated. My sessions with
me change how I saw myself ... now I can appreciate my crazy parents
... and live my own life as a happy, independent adult.
What really motivates people to
sabotage their lives, their families and their work?
- Secondary gains - how do you benefit by failing?
Identity Loss - are you present, conscious and awake?
Identifications - are you repeating an ancestor's
Transference - with whom do you want to feel connected?
DPI - Are you compensating for the death of a family
Entanglements - is it OK for you to be happier
than your parents?
Complex conflicts - does part of you object
to your own happiness?
Abuse / Trauma - does some
part of you act like an emotional child?
Guilt - do you feel undeserving of success because
you have hurt others?
Relationship bonds - do you have irrational beliefs
about yourself or your world?
Leaving these issues unresolved may cause you to
repeat self-sabotage in more try-cycles. If things don't change
- they stay the same! You can manage these issues or you can
prepare for more failure.
When do you Sabotage Yourself?
Do you procrastinate about making or implementing plans?
Do you daydream instead of working? Becoming conscious of when
you sabotage yourself does not end that cycle. Notice where,
with whom, how and how often you sabotage yourself.
Then we help you CHANGE destructive habits.
People who stop
growing up ... start growing old!
Dissolving self-sabotage is often a huge step towards getting
what you want! Yet changing this may require you change your attitude and your
sense of life. Dissolving self-defeating habits will likely bring you closer to
your goals than any amount of complaining, blaming or justifying your lack of
Motivation, Maturity and Inspiration
Are you sometimes too motivated?
We help people change obsessions and
compulsions into ordinary temptations.
Compulsions are strong motivations. If you’re too motivated, and
you want to change, we have something wonderful for you! Dissolving your self-defeating habits can bring you
much closer to your goals than motivational
Most self-sabotage reflects relationship problems.
Do you want to resolve emotional and relationship issues?
Online Systemic Coaching, Counseling & Soulwork Training
I thought you were just
another therapist - but you were not just. Not even. Not only.
Plagiarism is theft. Copyright
© Martyn Carruthers 2009-2018
All rights reserved.