Are you entangled in difficult relationships or painful
emotions? Do you suffer from abuse or trauma? We can help you
untangle your life and reclaim your freedom.
Guilt is a normal result of hurting people.
Anger is an expected result of injustice.
follows threats. Aggression is a normal response to unjust
People who are called paranoid often seem to be
trying to make sense
of confusing emotions.
We help people resolve emotional and relationship issues.
Symptoms of Paranoia
Paranoia refers to fixed, untrue beliefs that
other people are persecuting or trying to harm you, not to a feeling
of anxiety that other people may be critical of you.
Following abuse, trauma, emotional stress or sleep
deprivation, some people describe unpleasant anxiety or aggression
that may be called paranoia. Paranoid symptoms may also arise
from bonds of guilt and anger. Paranoia may follow an
accident, abandonment or betrayal. There are usually reasons for the
The main symptom of paranoia is delusion. This often appears
gradually, with people becoming increasingly irritable, suspicious, introverted,
selfish, depressed, obstinate, jealous and bitter. Such people rarely
acknowledge their own failures or faults, and prefer to blame and
criticize other people.
Paranoia often starts as suspicion, fuelled by anger, hatred and guilt. People may mistrust others, feel constantly irritated, be
easily offended and cannot forgive. They may strongly react to perceived criticism
and be preoccupied with conspiracy theories. They may fear being deceived,
incessantly argue and act in self-righteous and
Paranoid behavior often involves exaggerated feelings of
self-importance or persecution. People may function
and relate well in some contexts, yet they often try to
isolate themselves. They may say that other people cannot relax around them.
The fourth edition of the "Diagnostic and Statistical Manual
of Mental Disorders" (DSM-IV), lists these symptoms for
paranoid personality disorder:
- reads negative meanings into innocuous remarks
- preoccupied with unsupported doubts about friends or
- perceives attacks on his/her reputation and is quick
- reluctant to confide in others, fearing that
it may be used against him/her
- maintains unfounded suspicions regarding the fidelity of
a spouse or partner
- suspicious; unfounded suspicions; believes others are
plotting against him/her
We recommend that inexperienced helping professionals
refer people with symptoms of paranoid personality disorder to
experienced clinical psychologists.
Are You Paranoid Enough?
Many people say they have healthy paranoia - referring to
a suspicion of promotional offers that seem too good to be
true, and to a perception that trusting unknown people is
stupid. Many people have a reflexive distrust of strangers who call
them friends. What they are selling? (If you walk around open
markets, you may hear, "My friend ... my good friend ... !"
Some people deliberately try to induce paranoia in others
as a way to gain compliance. This may be done during induction
into cult-like groups and military organizations, and as preparation
for interrogation. Programs to induce paranoia often precede company
takeovers, military service and armed invasions.
Paranoia, Manipulation & Identity Loss
Paranoid people are often obsessed about manipulation ...
and they sometimes appear to be the worst manipulators ...
often under a disguise of self-protection.
|> How do you know, Martyn, who
you can trust with your knowledge
> and when it could be dangerous? I think so much about manipulation
> and I don't want people to get better at it. Can others use it to
> manipulate me? I try to stay aware of all manipulation. I protect
> myself and watch people very carefully.
> I work very hard to make sure that no-one can hurt me.
Paranoid behavior seems to be related to aggression, anxiety and guilt. We
help people manage the unpleasant consequences
of abusive relationships and
emotional incest etc,
and integrate hurt parts or fearful sub-personalities,
so that people with symptoms of paranoia can relax.
Split-off parts or partial personalities are common results
of abuse and trauma - we call this identity loss. Some
emotions that may precede paranoia are:
- Guilt - person avoids happiness
- Depressed - person is melancholy,
- Emotional swings
- person is endlessly conflicted
- Aggressive -
person is irritable, mean, wants to fight
- Dissociated - person is not there,
- Anxious - person is fearful, worried,
scared of ordinary things
- Psychosomatic - pain,
dysfunction and paralysis without medical cause
Consult a physician about any opinions about
paranoia or other medical conditions.
Paranoia & Victim Identification
Identity loss includes
identifying with someone else. A common identification that we
associate with paranoid symptoms is identification with a victim.
If you identify with a victim, you may feel and express
anger and guilt that the perceived victim did not express. You may feel
suspiciously evaluate each person you meet - if you decide the other
is a victim - you may try to help that person. If you decide
that the other is a victimizer, you may try to punish that person.
Some paranoid people dedicate their lives to helping victims and punishing victimizers.
My ex-husband wants to punish me.
He pretends to be happy with his new wife just to hurt me ... I hate the son of a bitch and I want him
to suffer as much
as I did ... only then can I relax.
Some common signs of victim identification are tensed knuckles
and flared nostrils (especially when remembering the alleged victimizer),
abnormally large jaw muscles (from grinding teeth) and lines of muscles on
the forehead. Both eyes and lips may become increasingly narrow over time.
(Try this simple exercise ... tense your
knuckles and flare your nostrils.
Tense your jaw muscles and wrinkle your
forehead. Narrow your lips and your eyes.
How do these tiny muscle tensions affect your thoughts and feelings?)
If you come to suspect that many victims are actually
victimizers - you may feel confused at first, and then express anger to people
that you consider to be manipulative victims (people who pretend to be victims to gain sympathy, power or other benefits).
Identification with a victim, combined with dissociation
following childhood abuse or abandonment, can comprise a systemic
basis for symptoms that may be called paranoid schizophrenia.
We can help people manage systemic imbalances and perceived
injustices. We help people become free to rebuild their own
identities, and to manage their emotions.
We often help people repair relationship
problems, false identifications and limiting beliefs as we help
people to define, plan and achieve their goals.
Online systemic coaching to resolve emotional
I thought you were just
another therapist - but you were not just. Not even. Not only.
Plagiarism is theft.
Copyright © Martyn Carruthers 2009-2018
All rights reserved.