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Soulwork Systemic Coaching: Summary

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Emotional Issues
Anger & Rage

Eating Problems
Emotional Maturity
Grief & Loss
Inner Child

Pain Control
Stress Relief

Toxic Beliefs
Trauma & Stress
Weight Loss


Relationship Problems

Dissolve Conflicts
Emotional Blackmail

Enjoy Partnership
Evaluate Partners
Long-Distance Love
Love & Hate

Past Partners
Sexual Issues
Soul Mates


Family Challenges

Brothers & Sisters
Divorce & Children
Emotional Incest
Family Meetings
Family Secrets

Fathers & Daughters
Fathers & Sons
Learning Disorders
Mothers & Daughters
Mothers & Sons

Parental Alienation


Life Lessons
Bad Habits
Being Alone
Children's Challenges
Observing Feelings

Patterns in Love
Personal Growth
Quantum Leap
Self Esteem
Self Improvement
Self Intimacy
Stress & Relaxing
Therapist and Clients


Chaos Coaching

Inner Conflict
Expert Modeling
Learning Disorders

Sexual Abuse
Soul of Soulwork
Systemic Management
Therapist Abuse
Training Abuse



Interview with Martyn
Fee, Cost, Price

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Solutions for Family Problems
Resolve Emotional & Relationship Problems

Online Family Coaching, Counseling & Therapy

Many emotional issues reflect family disturbances, such as abortion, suicide,
murder, infidelity etc. These relationship issues may manifest as emotions,
limiting beliefs, individual illnesses and destructive habits.

We help people untangle their emotions and build healthy relationships.

Are you Ready for a New Chapter in your Life?

Enmeshed means that your boundaries with other people are vague or blurred.

Do you want wholeness and justice; but you feel enmeshed with your family's lives? Do you identify with pain and suffering in your family ... especially ancestors, siblings, partners or children? Do you try to carry their suffering?

People who take on or carry someone else's suffering will experience strange emotions and illogical symptoms. If they try to heal themselves, solutions are often applied at a wrong level. For example, many people try to use drugs to solve relationship issues!

Emotions are flexible and can flow between people - especially between family members. In entangled relationships it may be difficult to say who owns which emotion! If one family member becomes angry or depressed, others may react by becoming angry or depressed.

Many people, perhaps most, are enmeshed or entangled with their family members, the living, the missing and the dead. These enmeshments can manifest in many ways, and can be managed by people with emotional maturity. We help people:

  1. Recover a sense of self
  2. Explore and define their goals
  3. Understand and clarify relationships
  4. Resolve any covert emotional incest
  5. Recognize and repair any mentor damage
  6. Resolve consequences of trauma or abuse
  7. Change any limiting beliefs and toxic bonds

Spirituality and Family Coaching

Spirituality can be a family resource - and a source of family conflict. Within a family, shared spirituality can shine like a lighthouse - helping people to grow emotionally as they grow as a family. Then each family member can be a resource for each other's development. Yet conflicts about dogma or "Who is right?" can tear families apart.

We help families develop a practical spirituality:

  1. Support each other
  2. Mentor younger members
  3. Experience maturity - not only aging
  4. Build foundations for success and leadership
  5. Experience connection to life and to humanity
  6. Support community harmony and social justice
  7. Manage emotions and solve relationship problems

Spiritual development may take place through study, prayer, meditation and service ... by exploring and healing the "family soul" as they heal themselves. People who respect other family members seem better connected to their own lives.

Are the "sins of the fathers" really passed on to their sons? Most cultures seem to have developed traditions of honoring and propitiating dead ancestors ... to avoid such entanglements between the living and the dead.

Your Family is Unique

We assume that each member of a family has a role and a purpose that no one else can fill. As families improve their balance and harmony, they redefine the roles and purposes of family members. As they move towards their individual and family visions, their life paths can open wide.

Ancestral entanglements seem to be passed down through many generations, often becoming family traditions that motivate behaviors, beliefs, compulsions and obsessions. Many family entanglements are taboo bonds that cannot be considered, discussed or rationalized. Few people can heal family problems or relationship issues that they cannot even recognize, let alone talk about.

When people realize that they're not locked into their obsessions and compulsions,  choice become possible. Those people can then perceive other family members as unique human beings who were also caught up in similar entanglements.

As people understand their entanglements, irritation can turn into compassion. And, if you have understood the roots of your own pains and struggles, you probably find compassion for other people who are still trapped.

Temporary Family Members

We help people manage their emotions and solve family problems. We use and teach skills and perspectives. We train coaches, counselors and therapists to help individuals, couples and families move toward integration and connectedness.

Often, apparently simple problems represent mazes of entanglements - and strange perspectives on a family and its history. To better guide this exploration, we help people interpret and understand how their histories affect their lives ... and we use this to find lasting solutions for emotional issues and relationship problems.

I was skeptical about your work, but a trusted friend, who is also a therapist,
suggested that I contact you, even though your premises seem off-base.
My experience was profound ... I do not agree with all your ideas
but I do feel an incredible relief that I cannot easily explain.

Guide us to guide you. Together we can explore and strive to understand the emotional logic underlying your emotions and use it to change unwanted relationship habits.

Integrity & Sense of Life

We help people explore their conscious beliefs and change their unconscious bonds. We help people develop beliefs that support balance and harmony - moving towards an experience of "Finally ... my life and my family makes sense!"


Few people can disconnect from their families or from their family habits. Their lives are tied to their family members ... the living, the missing and the dead. We help people explore their goals and manage their suffering in the context of their relationships.

Again and again we find that pain and suffering affects other family members, even across generations and international borders. We help people manage the consequences - the beliefs, attitudes and habits - of their bonds and entanglements

Some of these changes may be subtle and some dramatic, although each provides opportunities for personal responsibility, family integrity and community development.

Contact us to manage your emotions and solve relationship problems

Online Coaching, Relationship Counseling & Systemic Therapy

Plagiarism is theft. Copyright Martyn Carruthers 2010-2018
All rights reserved

If you like our work, please link to us. If you know someone who might benefit,
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For online help, email us at:

Soulwork systemic coaching in America & Hawaii


Soulwork systemic coaching in England, Wales & Scotland

Soulwork systemic coaching in Croatia & Serbia

Soulwork systemic coaching in Poland



Have You Suffered Enough?

 Where are you now? Understand your emotions, fixations and enmeshments
What do you hope for? Know your goals and stop sabotaging yourself
Do you feel resourceful? Learn to develop your inner resources
Do emotions block you? Relationship problems and mentor damage
Do your beliefs limit you? Change limiting beliefs and end dependence
Do you feel connected? Resolve identity issues to recover lost resources
Is your partner happy? Build healthy partnership (or separate peacefully)
Are your children healthy? Happy parents better manage family problems
Do you want team success? Team leaders and their teams develop together
Do you have complex goals? Specialty coaching, counseling & therapy

Plagiarism is theft. Copyright Martyn Carruthers 1996-2018  All rights reserved. Soulwork Systemic Coaching was primarily developed by Martyn Carruthers to help people solve emotional problems and relationship conflicts to achieve their goals. These concepts and strategies are for general knowledge only. Consult a physician about medical conditions and before changing medical treatment. Don't steal intellectual property ... get permission to post, publish or teach Martyn's work - email