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Experience Spirituality
Online Solutions for Happy Heretics Martyn Carruthers

Online Life Coaching & Soulwork Therapy

No philosophy that I have ever heard or read gave any reasonable purpose for
man's existence, nor any rational clue to his proper conduct.
Robert Heinlein

Spiritual theories are interesting, not for what they say about spirituality,
rather for what they say about people.

Our work has a spiritual dimension, and although I have difficulty writing about an abstract spirituality, I often help people access and explore specific experiences that many call spiritual - experiences which are valuable when searching for personal meaning, personal integrity and a personal sense of life.

Each person appears to have a core of integrity and connectedness - an experience  through which you can feel part of and connected to all that is. (I don't ask you to believe me - experience it for yourself!) I call this experience Soul, and this path to it Soulwork. We often help people experience this integrity and connectedness.

What do you remember from your early childhood? What do anticipate in your old age? When we help people explore their forgotten past and their future memories, many people describe a sense of a primordial dimension - not lost, just not yet found. I hear many descriptions of their experiences. (For more on this see chaos coaching).

You probably cried when your baby body was born ... what will be your last sounds when your old body dies, when your light fades to darkness? When I say, "What was not born cannot die?", I suggest that an unborn you has always existed - and will continue to exist. Not only a memory of your body or actions, rather an ongoing experience.

What are your reasons for living? Have you chosen a life purpose - perhaps a purpose bigger than your life? Do you want to define and fulfill your life purpose, and live a life rich in meaning? Do you want to experience profound connectedness? You can access connectedness by integrity and responsibility, tied together by how you express and receive love. Or you can feel lost and without purpose. You always have choices.

Spirituality & Maturity

Many of my clients describe feelings of isolation or disconnection. My clients are typically highly educated, caring people, often faithful to spiritual traditions that they learned as children. But spirituality usually develops with maturity, opening a continuum of truth rather than fixations on other people's definitions of ultimate truths.

Most young people accept first their parents' beliefs and later the dogma of their parents' religion or philosophy. Later, as young adults they are more likely to explore other paths, often seeking ways to deepen and share a sense of life.

For me, a goal of spirituality is maturity - which for me means appropriately expressing love, honesty and integrity. This goal may only become conscious after a breakdowns or a mid-life crisis which challenge immature beliefs and bonds.

Personal development seems intertwined with spiritual development. Although I help many people to change their habits - and although they may be happier, more competent, more successful, more balanced and less complaining; I do not consider personality change or increased resourcefulness to be particularly spiritual.

Simply being with mature people who enjoy life, even if spirituality is not discussed, can motivate me to be more mature - more complete. Expressions of honesty, love, and integrity inspire me to deepen my search for my own path.

I cannot live in integrity if I condemn others, falsify facts or avoid reality. I no longer seek esoteric agencies. Life is not a struggle if I flow with it, life is a series of choices in which I can choose to act with responsibility.

If enlightenment is a future goal, it will never come, and life passes quickly. Focusing on the future or the past seem to be egotistic functions that block one's vision of NOW. This vision is more likely to arise if we focus on all of life or all living things.

We show our integrity when we assess what we are doing or when we explore our inner selves without prejudice. Rather than searching for ways to appear special, we can follow our own agenda. An ego - a sense of separateness - can be a wonderful tool for learning from the past, for making decisions and for planning the future.

Blocks to Spirituality

... any sect, cult, or religion will legislate its creed into law if it acquires the political power to do so, and will follow it by suppressing opposition, subverting education to seize early the minds of the young, and by killing, locking up, or driving underground all heretics
Robert Heinlein

Do you want help finding your own answers and experiences about life meaning and life purpose? We can help you create an inspired vision for your life, your family or for an organization, especially if you seek to align your daily activities with your values.

You can enjoy safe, speedy and lasting alternatives to ineffective habits, to psychoactive drugs, hypnotic marketing and programming. We can help you:

  1. Enjoy personal transformation
  2. Develop your honesty and integrity
  3. Find energy, hope and enthusiasm
  4. Build connectedness and happiness
  5. Trust your inner wisdom and integrity
  6. Be whole; at work, at home and at play
  7. Cope with grief, guilt, shame, change and loss

Do you want to evaluate your relationships and improve spiritual connections? Do you want to change negative emotions and solve relationship issues?

If your life lacks sense, you can expect to feel bored, frustrated and depressed, perhaps feeling trapped in relationships that lack meaning. A developed sense of purpose and desire for lasting happiness requires that you live a life that makes sense.

Do you want to move on? We can

  • Help you focus on integrity
  • Provoke you when you are lazy
  • Support you in finding your vision
  • Support you in planning your path
  • Inspire you to design and create a meaningful life
  • Help you change your barriers, blocks and resistances

Results and Feedback

When we ask for feedback, people often tell me:

  • I better know who I am
  • I better accept reality as it is
  • I feel enriched by my relationships
  • I experience more joy and happiness
  • I attract more mature, responsible people
  • I am more calm and peaceful under stress
  • I have managed some difficult relationship situations

Other results include the simplicity and ease with which you can calm your mind and connect with your sense of life. When you can step into your power and enrich your life,   you can live with a sense of Soul! We can help you create a safe space to experience, explore and manifest your visions.

Do you want to calm your mind, end your self-criticism, and clarify what you want
and the changes you wish to make? Do you want to gain insights and perspectives
on your challenges and behaviors? Do you want to manage your emotions, solve relationship issues and make better decisions?

Online Help, Relationship Counseling & Soulwork Therapy

Steps to Spiritual Experience

Accessing abstract experiences may be confused by doctrines, creeds,
dogmas, rites, rituals, mythic dramas and symbolic personifications.

  1. Assume that you can experience a spiritual connectedness.

  2. Develop a desire to become responsible, mature and to live with integrity.

  3. Accept the birth, life and death of your body as transient events.

  4. Seek opportunities to transcend your transient life to eternal connectedness.

  5. Find a guide who has experienced the path and is willing to help you transcend your doubts, beliefs, resistances and other blocks

I thought you were just another therapist - but you were not just. Not even. Not only.

Plagiarism is theft. Copyright Martyn Carruthers 2002-2016 All rights reserved

If you find our work useful, please link to us. If you know someone who might benefit,
please mention or

Soulwork systemic coaching in America & Hawaii


Soulwork systemic coaching in England, Wales & Scotland

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Soulwork systemic coaching in Poland


Solve Emotional & Relationship Issues

Have You Suffered Enough?

 Where are you now? Understand your emotions, fixations and enmeshments
What do you want? Know your life goals and how you sabotage yourself
Do you feel resourceful? Develop your inner resources with Dreamwork
Do emotions block you? Resolve relationship problems and mentor damage
Do beliefs limit you? Change your limiting beliefs and end dependence
Can you feel connected? Resolve identity loss to recover your lost resources
Is your partner happy? Build healthy partnership (or separate peacefully)
Are your children healthy? Happy parents can better manage family problems
Do you want team success? Team leaders and top teams can develop together
Do you have complex goals? Specialty coaching, counseling, therapy & training

Plagiarism is theft. Copyright Martyn Carruthers 1996-2016 All rights reserved. Soulwork Systemic Coaching was developed by Martyn Carruthers
to help people solve emotional and relationship problems, and to achieve their goals. These concepts and strategies are for general knowledge only. Consult a physician about medical conditions and before changing medical treatment. Don't steal intellectual property ... get permission to post, publish or teach Martyn's work.