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Suicidal Thoughts & Feelings

Relationship Coaching ... Systemic Coach Training

If you feel suicidal right now, please take a few minutes to read this. We will not try to talk you out of your bad feelings. We are not psychologists nor psychiatrists nor even particularly religious - we are just people who know something about suffering.

If you are considering ending your life - we ask you for five minutes. During this five minutes, you can read a few simple, practical ideas. We won’t argue with you about your thoughts and feelings. We assume that if you are considering suicide, you feel pretty bad.

  Depression happens if  
 life does not make sense!

Being depressed does not mean that you are evil, crazy or weak. Perhaps your life just doesn't seem to make much sense.

Life includes many kinds of suffering. Whether your suffering becomes unbearable depends on your resources. Suicidal feelings may result when your suffering seems to exceed your resources. Suicidal thoughts often follow a crisis that exposes a lack of life purpose or meaning of life.

  You can survive a suicidal crisis  
 - if - you can make life make sense!

We wish to share a few thoughts with you.

1. You can get through this - even if you feel as badly as you feel.

2. You can give yourself space. You can say, “I will wait a day, or a week, before I do anything”. Feelings are not actions - just because you feel like killing yourself, doesn’t mean that you have to. Put some distance between your feelings and your actions.

3. You can find relief from suffering. Remember that you have to be alive to feel that relief.

4. You can understand that people may react badly to your suicidal feelings. Maybe they feel guilty, angry, frightened or sad. They are reacting to their emotions, not to you.

5.Suicidal thoughts and feelings are exhausting. After they subside, you can care for yourself. Therapy is often a really good idea, as are self-help groups in your community and on the Internet.

6. You can find people who can walk with you through this horrible time. People who will not judge you, or argue with you, or send you to a hospital. They will simply help you make life make sense. Find one. Now. Use your space. Tell someone what’s going on. It is OK to ask for help.

7. You can talk about how you got to where you are, release a lot of pressure, and regain your balance.

  • USA - call The Samaritans: Call 1-800-SUICIDE
  • USA teenagers - call Covenant House: Call 1-800-999-9999
  • Look in your telephone directory for a crisis number
  • Call a doctor or a therapist
  • Call a friend or a minister, a priest, an imam or a rabbi - someone who can listen!
  • Calling the police (911 in America; 999 in UK) is way better than nothing!

A wonderful resource is a human being to talk with - someone who wants to listen to you. Talk about how you feel and how you got here. Many people want to hear from you. It’s time to look for them.

Can you talk to people who feels as bad or even worse than you do? Strangely, this can sometimes provide enormous help to both of you.

A resource that has helped many people is a poem called the Desiderata. It provides simple steps for living your life true to yourself.

[ Desiderata ]

To increase your sense of life, focus on your children, find purpose in hobbies or community involvement. Perhaps explore a religion or spiritual path. Systemic Coach Training helps people access and experience integrity - an "integrated connectedness" (the Soul of Soulwork) which provides a profound and lasting sense of life direction and life purpose.

NOTE: Be sure to consult your physician regarding the applicability of any opinions or recommendations with respect to suicidal thoughts, medical symptoms or medical conditions.

 

This page is a service of Soulwork Systemic Solutions. We train helping professionals in Systemic Coaching and Relationship Management.

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  • All material on this website is copyright © 2001-2006 by Martyn Carruthers. All rights reserved. Commercial use is prohibited. Reproduction in whole or in part in any form or medium is permitted with the express written permission of Martyn Carruthers. This material may be freely linked to by other electronic text. For more information, contact Jan Sikorski at +48 (22) 733 0357